Thank you Laura Gabrielle Feasey for the prompt Escape to write a 400 word story from.  Hope you guys like this…

Not many people can do what he does.  Everyday he reminds himself how entirely singular his job is, how all he has to do is follow instructions and get paid by the bucket load.  How fortunate he is to live the life that he lives!

And yet he was not happy, no, not even content. Yes he got paid lots.  Yes he got laid lots but his situation, his life, was just a series of fortunate moments.  Not a consistent line headed upwards towards a brighter future, a positive correlation of action and reaction equal to joy and wisdom and growth, more like a heartbeat, big highs and big lows but always at one level.  One rate, no growth, just movement that’s what he was.  He was still alive, heart still beating, air still pumped in and out of his body and that was in itself an achievement, but at night whilst his friends slept through their hangover, he semi-soberly thought on his life and where it would end.  What he truly wanted seemed a far away spot on an unobtainable horizon, the green light on the end of Daisy Buchannan’s dock and he was Jay Gatsby, his hand grasping at it but never quite reaching it.  That book ended in ruin and now he saw that same desire so present in Gatsby in himself and it scared him.

He wanted that heartbeat to stop, to ascend to a Nirvana but as he was constantly reminded, he was in the happy place.  In a world where millions lay hungry in the dirt, he was well fed and with goose-down  pillows.  He was warm and cosy with more money than he could possibly need, so then why did this not feel like his happy place?  Maybe his job, his notoriety, his love of liquor were traps set by some higher power to ensnare him and he was to relinquish his grasp on them before they consumed him as he did them: wholy and with no thought for the future.

So he sets down his bottle of whisky, stands and stretches.  He steps over bodies thick with knowledge and greed crumpled on the floor and steps out into the dark street.  He was on his way into his eternity, his happy eternity.

Hope you all have a wonderful day and let me know what out think in the comments below!!!

Also if you can think of a different title for it I would be extremely grateful.


6 thoughts on “Escape

  1. I liked this piece but found the outside reference distracting from your piece. I think your piece would stand alone better without it. I could be entirely wrong, just my opinion.


  2. I like your spin of him escaping himself. I really like your Gatsby references, it nailed down exactly how the main character was feeling for me. Maybe, if you’re not happy with it, you could allude to it instead of writing it out?


    1. Definitely an idea I’ll try out in my next piece. I love referencing the work of other authors because sometimes when they nail a concept key to your piece all you can do is a pale imitation of it so it’s a way around that. Have a wonderful day x


  3. Great story. I particularly liked how the end is open for interpretation. The ‘glass half full’ side of me sees him walking into a happier, more fulfilled life, yet the ‘glass half empty’ side sees him ending his life as a way of escape. It’s good to get reader’s thinking though! I’m not sure about a title name, you could just call it ‘Escape’, or maybe a synonym off, such as ‘Break Free’ or ‘Make a Break for it’ or something…?


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s